Thursday, January 20, 2005

god hates spongebob

ah, agape press... what a happy little name that is: agape being a greek word used in the bible to describe unconditional unselfish love, the highest form of love, that perfect love that god had for mankind, or love for all mankind. jesus commanded us to agape our neighbors, so they say.

so let's see what kind of lovely christian messages we can find on a news site with such a wholesome name:

It is as unprecedented as it is cunning, using all the right words and happiest faces in an attempt to speak directly to the nation's children about "tolerance and diversity." Once again, of course, those ideas include homosexual advocacy.

so christians don't like tolerance and diversity?

and who is this false prophet who is spreading this vile, immoral, and anti-christian message of tolerance and diversity? why, the devil himself, also known as spongebob squarepants!

"Does anybody here know SpongeBob?" Dr. James C. Dobson, the founder of Focus on the Family, asked the guests Tuesday night at a black-tie dinner for members of Congress and political allies to celebrate the election results.

SpongeBob needed no introduction. In addition to his popularity among children, who watch his cartoon show, he has become a well-known camp figure among adult gay men, perhaps because he holds hands with his animated sidekick Patrick and likes to watch the imaginary television show "The Adventures of Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy."

Now, Dr. Dobson said, SpongeBob's creators had enlisted him in a "pro-homosexual video," in which he appeared alongside children's television colleagues like Barney and Jimmy Neutron, among many others. The makers of the video, he said, planned to mail it to thousands of elementary schools to promote a "tolerance pledge" that includes tolerance for differences of "sexual identity."

love thy brother, so long as he doesn't "love" his brothers in the wrong way, if you know what i mean, wink wink nudge nudge.

supposedly the video features 100 characters from cartoons & children's shows. so why are the crusaders focusing on spongebob, the one character out of all of then who by definition cannot be homosexual because sponges reproduce asexually?

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