check out my latest shirt design for threadless:
this is a reworking of my "escape" design, which was my highest-scoring submission to date. people seemed to like the concept, but i got some complaints that it was too small and square. i think this version is a major improvement in several areas. ¶
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Friday, April 24, 2009
friday cat bending
this week's cat bending demonstrates the photoshop 6 truncation glitch, discovered by daniel temkin. more lilybending here. ¶
Thursday, April 23, 2009
fighting for the right to mistreat animals
as cynical as i've become over the years, i'm still occasionally surprised by political developments. so while i'm not surprised at resistance to a proposed indiana bill restricting puppy mills, i am surprised at who it's coming from, and why:
so there's a bill to protect dogs from mistreatment, and these people are talking about livestock?
ignoring the question of whether these types of restrictions should be applied to livestock—some of them probably should, as operations such as CAFOs are bad both for the animals as well as for the environment—how does this make sense? dogs are raised as pets, not livestock, so how and why would laws pertaining to dogs be applied to cattle or hogs? the logic is strained.
but most disappointing is that a state government agency is secretly lobbying to defeat this bill. perhaps i shouldn't be surprised, considering that the man in charge is mitch daniels, who's always happy to sell out the environment in favor of business interests, but still i am. how appropriate, then, that the story comes out the day after earth day, fresh on the heels of yesterday's revelation that indiana fallss at the bottom of nearly every conceivable environmental ranking.
not only does mitch daniels not care about the environment; now we know he doesn't even care about protecting puppies from abuse.
update: becky skillman chimes in:
here are some of the changes that have been made:
in other words, skillman was in favor of the bill, as long as most of its teeth were removed first. ¶
Indiana Department of Agriculture officials have been working behind the scenes to defeat legislation that would crack down on abusive dog breeders by trying to discredit one of the bill's leading supporters.
Their target: the Humane Society of the United States.
Although the department has taken no official position on the legislation, it acknowledges it has highlighted the Humane Society's history of opposition to confined farming practices, common in Indiana, especially in huge hog operations where animals are raised in close quarters.
A document the agency distributed to lawmakers alleges the Humane Society's goal was the "abolition of all animal agriculture," a notion the group rejected Wednesday. Critics of the bill worry that it could lead to new restrictions on livestock.
so there's a bill to protect dogs from mistreatment, and these people are talking about livestock?
ignoring the question of whether these types of restrictions should be applied to livestock—some of them probably should, as operations such as CAFOs are bad both for the animals as well as for the environment—how does this make sense? dogs are raised as pets, not livestock, so how and why would laws pertaining to dogs be applied to cattle or hogs? the logic is strained.
but most disappointing is that a state government agency is secretly lobbying to defeat this bill. perhaps i shouldn't be surprised, considering that the man in charge is mitch daniels, who's always happy to sell out the environment in favor of business interests, but still i am. how appropriate, then, that the story comes out the day after earth day, fresh on the heels of yesterday's revelation that indiana fallss at the bottom of nearly every conceivable environmental ranking.
not only does mitch daniels not care about the environment; now we know he doesn't even care about protecting puppies from abuse.
update: becky skillman chimes in:
On Thursday, Lt. Gov Becky Skillman's office, which oversees the Department of Agriculture, said Gov. Mitch Daniels' administration backed the bill.
"We are definitely in favor of regulation and the ability to prosecute some of these bad actors and puppy mills that are out there," said Jay Kenworthy, Skillman's press secretary. "There's no effort to kill the bill. We just wanted to see a few changes."
here are some of the changes that have been made:
No limit to the number of dogs an owner can breed. No state inspections of commercial breeding facilities. No restrictions on how often a dog can be bred.
in other words, skillman was in favor of the bill, as long as most of its teeth were removed first. ¶
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
nice work if you can get it
when i was in high school, many years ago (my 15th reunion is coming up), like many aspiring writers i kept notebooks where i'd jot poems, short stories, song lyrics, and what have you.
most of these were naturally terrible, and i'd be ashamed to show them now. one such awful story involved a photo shoot being interrupted by right-wing censors. the "twist" if you can call it that was that the model in the shoot (naturally inspired by a fellow student i was crushing on at the time) was in fact modestly dressed, but still the photo shoot was censored because the model was so pretty that it was believed her smile alone would be overly titillating.
the story was stupid and corny; the twist not particularly clever. and it wasn't so much meant as a clever satire (which is wasn't), but more as an excuse to fantasize about a pretty classmate. so imagine my surprise at how things have changed since i was in school.
these days, a teenage girl in a swimsuit can get prosecuted for child pornography simply for posing for a photo if she's "posed provocatively"—which i take to mean if she's cute.
under the current (insane) interpretation of the law, "child pornography" is so impossibly illegal that teenagers can't even own mildly erotic photographs of themselves. a teenage girl who takes a photo of herself in a bra or bikini risks being placed on the sex offender registry for life.
but there is one loophole. apparently, the only people who are allowed to own "child pornography" are teachers and school administrators:
atrios quoted this passage on his blog, but i think he ended the quote one paragraph too soon:
no one, that is, except for skumanick himself, who no doubt has a copy of every racy photo his students have ever sexted to each other, and has surely seen them all multiple times.
now, i don't know if skumanick is the kind of guy who'd go home and touch himself while looking at all those photos of underage girls with their shirts off. i'd like to think that he's not. but i do know that if i were that type of guy, a job like skumanick's would be my dream job.
update: as john m points out in the comments, skumanick is actually the district attorney, so it appears that the best way to get your hands on lewd photos of underage girls is actually to work in the DA's office. though i'm sure school administrators do still get to see plenty of that stuff. ¶
most of these were naturally terrible, and i'd be ashamed to show them now. one such awful story involved a photo shoot being interrupted by right-wing censors. the "twist" if you can call it that was that the model in the shoot (naturally inspired by a fellow student i was crushing on at the time) was in fact modestly dressed, but still the photo shoot was censored because the model was so pretty that it was believed her smile alone would be overly titillating.
the story was stupid and corny; the twist not particularly clever. and it wasn't so much meant as a clever satire (which is wasn't), but more as an excuse to fantasize about a pretty classmate. so imagine my surprise at how things have changed since i was in school.
these days, a teenage girl in a swimsuit can get prosecuted for child pornography simply for posing for a photo if she's "posed provocatively"—which i take to mean if she's cute.
under the current (insane) interpretation of the law, "child pornography" is so impossibly illegal that teenagers can't even own mildly erotic photographs of themselves. a teenage girl who takes a photo of herself in a bra or bikini risks being placed on the sex offender registry for life.
but there is one loophole. apparently, the only people who are allowed to own "child pornography" are teachers and school administrators:
atrios quoted this passage on his blog, but i think he ended the quote one paragraph too soon:
Marissa and her parents joined a group of about 50 others at the courthouse. Before showing the photos, Mr. Skumanick explained his offer to the crowd, answering one father's question affirmatively, that -- yes -- a girl in a bathing suit could be subjected to criminal charges because she was posed "provocatively."
Mr. Skumanick told them he could have simply charged the kids. Instead, he gave them two weeks to decide: take the class or face charges.
He then told the parents and teens to line up if they wanted to view the photos, which were printed out onto index cards. As the 17-year-old who took semi-nude self-portraits waited in line, she realized that Mr. Skumanick and other investigators had viewed the pictures. When the adults began to crowd around Mr. Skumanick, the 17-year-old worried they could see her photo and recalls she said, "I think the worst punishment is knowing that all you old guys saw me naked. I just think you guys are all just perverts."
Mr. Skumanick dismisses the criticism, saying that no one could see photos of teens who weren't their own children.
no one, that is, except for skumanick himself, who no doubt has a copy of every racy photo his students have ever sexted to each other, and has surely seen them all multiple times.
now, i don't know if skumanick is the kind of guy who'd go home and touch himself while looking at all those photos of underage girls with their shirts off. i'd like to think that he's not. but i do know that if i were that type of guy, a job like skumanick's would be my dream job.
update: as john m points out in the comments, skumanick is actually the district attorney, so it appears that the best way to get your hands on lewd photos of underage girls is actually to work in the DA's office. though i'm sure school administrators do still get to see plenty of that stuff. ¶
Friday, April 17, 2009
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
lowered expectations
yesterday: "Organizers expect about 8,000 people to protest excessive government spending tomorrow at the Indiana Statehouse."
this morning: "Organizers say they expect several thousand people to attend this afternoon's event in Indianapolis."
this afternoon: "Police estimated about 2,500 people attended the rally, though organizers claimed their numbers were as large as 9,000." ¶
this morning: "Organizers say they expect several thousand people to attend this afternoon's event in Indianapolis."
this afternoon: "Police estimated about 2,500 people attended the rally, though organizers claimed their numbers were as large as 9,000." ¶
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
the once and future flak
shorter every post ever by mike o'brien: hello! my name is mike and i'm a right-wing lobbyist and paid republican flak. on every issue, i agree 100% with governor daniels and disagree 100% with obama and the stupid democrats.
bonus shorter executive producer brady gibson: we want WRTV's capitol watchblog to be the first place on the web you visit for political news and debtate. that's why we now have three right-wing bloggers on our payroll compared to one left-winger. ¶
bonus shorter executive producer brady gibson: we want WRTV's capitol watchblog to be the first place on the web you visit for political news and debtate. that's why we now have three right-wing bloggers on our payroll compared to one left-winger. ¶
Sunday, April 12, 2009
afraid to lead
mayor greg ballard's administration seems to have hit a low point today. not only did the indy star devote its entire behind closed doors column to his lack of leadership on the CIB bailout (printing a most unflattering photo alongside it), but the lead editorial was on the same topic.
but the unkindest cut of all must be that even ballard's top apologist, abdul hakim shabazz, is now criticizing him. this is quite likely the first time abdul has ever said so much as one word critical of the mayor, so this must be a watershed moment.
the question liberal blogs have been asking for months is now on everyone's lips: where the eff is mayor ballard? he loves to talk about leadership, but when is he actually going to show some?
the star editorial suggests one explanation:
so the mayor is afraid to show some leadership because it might upset some legislators? is there a passage in ballard's book about this that i can quote ironically? because i can't be bothered to spend money on a copy of the thing. ¶
but the unkindest cut of all must be that even ballard's top apologist, abdul hakim shabazz, is now criticizing him. this is quite likely the first time abdul has ever said so much as one word critical of the mayor, so this must be a watershed moment.
the question liberal blogs have been asking for months is now on everyone's lips: where the eff is mayor ballard? he loves to talk about leadership, but when is he actually going to show some?
the star editorial suggests one explanation:
Insiders in the Ballard administration say the mayor has been reluctant to push forward his own solutions out of concern that any assertiveness on his part might anger legislative leaders.
so the mayor is afraid to show some leadership because it might upset some legislators? is there a passage in ballard's book about this that i can quote ironically? because i can't be bothered to spend money on a copy of the thing. ¶
glitch aesthetic goes mainstream?
this, my friends, is the latest kanye west video:
i don't know whether to be stoked that this shiz is on mtv now, or disappointed that the director is just another hollywood video director and not an underground glitch artist. (kanye should have hired this guy or this guy instead.) ¶
i don't know whether to be stoked that this shiz is on mtv now, or disappointed that the director is just another hollywood video director and not an underground glitch artist. (kanye should have hired this guy or this guy instead.) ¶
Friday, April 10, 2009
the idea man
shorter mitch daniels: i don't like the senate's plan for spending indiana's share of the stimulus money. we should instead spend that money on [mumbles inaudibly].
furthermore, i think building a casino in downtown indy to fund the CIB is a terrible idea. there are much better options, such as [mumbles inaudibly].¶
furthermore, i think building a casino in downtown indy to fund the CIB is a terrible idea. there are much better options, such as [mumbles inaudibly].¶
friday cat bending
it's been a while since i did any cat bending, and now i have a new cat, so here's some fun with the wordpad effect.¶
Thursday, April 09, 2009
a voter by any other name
over in texas, they're debating a voter ID law. here in indiana, where we've had voter ID for a few years, we know that such laws are highly problematic. (the #1 problem, naturally, is that they're completely unnecessary, a solution in search of a problem.) yesterday, the texas house heard testimony about one problem that i haven't seen discussed elsewhere: not only do some people have names that may sound "weird" to american ears, but some names can't even be directly translated to the latin alphabet:
so what do you do if you have a difficult-to-spell name? back in the old days, the folks at ellis island would've just changed your name to "joe smith" and that'd be that. apparently, texas rep betty brown would like to go back to those days:
pretty simple, really. if your name is in some crazy moon language and you want to vote here in america, just change your name to something american. steve is a good name. or frank, that's a good one. women can pick names like mary or lisa.
rep brown insists her suggestion wasn't racially motivated. she was only trying to address an identification problem. but let's face it: asians aren't the only people with weird names. so if we're going to make people change their names like we used to, we should do it across the board: eastern europeans, aboriginal descent, even blacks. i mean, what kind of a name is kanye west, for example? or, for that matter, barack obama?
just think of it: president steve obama! now that's a name change you can believe in! ¶
The exchange occurred late Tuesday as the House Elections Committee heard testimony from Ramey Ko, a representative of the Organization of Chinese Americans.
Ko told the committee that people of Chinese, Japanese and Korean descent often have problems voting and other forms of identification because they may have a legal transliterated name and then a common English name that is used on their driver's license on school registrations.
so what do you do if you have a difficult-to-spell name? back in the old days, the folks at ellis island would've just changed your name to "joe smith" and that'd be that. apparently, texas rep betty brown would like to go back to those days:
"Rather than everyone here having to learn Chinese — I understand it's a rather difficult language — do you think that it would behoove you and your citizens to adopt a name that we could deal with more readily here?" Brown said.
Brown later told Ko: "Can't you see that this is something that would make it a lot easier for you and the people who are poll workers if you could adopt a name just for identification purposes that's easier for Americans to deal with?"
pretty simple, really. if your name is in some crazy moon language and you want to vote here in america, just change your name to something american. steve is a good name. or frank, that's a good one. women can pick names like mary or lisa.
rep brown insists her suggestion wasn't racially motivated. she was only trying to address an identification problem. but let's face it: asians aren't the only people with weird names. so if we're going to make people change their names like we used to, we should do it across the board: eastern europeans, aboriginal descent, even blacks. i mean, what kind of a name is kanye west, for example? or, for that matter, barack obama?
just think of it: president steve obama! now that's a name change you can believe in! ¶
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
my gallery show opens this thursday
my first-ever solo gallery show—which i've alluded to in prior posts—opens this thursday (april 2) at 111 arts gallery in downtown muncie.
the show will feature nine databent prints and several poster-sized collages. all art will be priced affordably (nothing higher than $50–$60), because even in these hard times it's nice to have some cool art on your walls.
come on by and say hi! or if you can't make it thursday, my stuff will be up all month.
the show will feature nine databent prints and several poster-sized collages. all art will be priced affordably (nothing higher than $50–$60), because even in these hard times it's nice to have some cool art on your walls.
come on by and say hi! or if you can't make it thursday, my stuff will be up all month.
Monday, March 30, 2009
we has a new kitteh
meet our new kitten. she's a six-month-old blue tabby. we're calling her lily.
we just adopted her last night and she's still a bit shy, but she's also adorable.
we just adopted her last night and she's still a bit shy, but she's also adorable.
Saturday, March 28, 2009
still more IMPD embarrassments
seems like hardly a month can go by without at least one IMPD officer getting busted for doing something shady if not outright illegal. first there's this guy:
it's a nightmare all right, but surely much worse for the girl he's allegedly molested.
then today there's this story:
allender's name had come up previously in earlier stories about the omnisource bust. and while he's not being charged for being an accessory to scrap metal theft—at least at this time—the IMPD apparently did find that his moonlighting at omnisource had corrupted him to the point that he scheduled his fellow moonlighters according to what was best at omnisource, not what was best for the city or for the police department.
when will the police scandals end? ¶
A Marion County correction officer was in court Friday facing newly filed charges of child molesting, incest and sexual misconduct with a minor.
Richard B. Alsup, 39, faces a dozen counts involving accusations of improper sexual conduct with a female relative younger than 16, lasting as long as two years. Alsup, who also was a reserve officer with the Indianapolis Metropolitan Police Department, told a judge he is on administrative leave from the Sheriff's Department.
The Indianapolis Star generally does not identify victims of alleged sexual assaults.
Alsup told police he had been having nightmares about having sex with the girl, according to a probable cause affidavit. He told an investigator "he didn't want to believe he could do those things to (the girl), but that he could not say those things didn't happen," the affidavit says.
it's a nightmare all right, but surely much worse for the girl he's allegedly molested.
then today there's this story:
The commander of the Indianapolis Metropolitan Police Department's North District is being stripped of his position in the wake of an investigation into moonlighting by off-duty officers, public safety officials said Friday.
Maj. David Allender -- one of 51 officers who worked part-time security jobs for a metal-recycling firm linked to allegations that its workers knowingly purchased stolen metal -- will be busted to his merit rank of captain and reassigned to new duties within a week, public safety officials said in an e-mail to The Indianapolis Star.
[...]
"Having gathered new information about the deployment of precious police resources in the context of competing demands for officer time by private employers," Newman wrote in the e-mail, "we were no longer confident that only (the public's) interests were being served at all times."
Newman said the department expects to soon name Allender's replacement.
Deputy Chief John Conley stressed that Allender's demotion "was not related to any scrap-metal investigation and has no criminal violations or implications."
Rather, Conley wrote, the change came because of "time management and management of resources that should have been designated full-time to the public."
allender's name had come up previously in earlier stories about the omnisource bust. and while he's not being charged for being an accessory to scrap metal theft—at least at this time—the IMPD apparently did find that his moonlighting at omnisource had corrupted him to the point that he scheduled his fellow moonlighters according to what was best at omnisource, not what was best for the city or for the police department.
when will the police scandals end? ¶
Thursday, March 26, 2009
shorter post-revolt wrap-up
shorter gary welsh: despite what you may have heard, my speech totally rocked yesterday, and anyone who tells you different is a dishonest sellout.
shorter paul k ogden: i don't understand why reporters and liberal bloggers keep mocking my event, just because it lacked focus and a lot of the people there were fringe types and crackpots. they should thanks me—nay, exalt and praise me!
shorter melyssa donaghy: they laugh at us because they're scared!
bonus shorter indiana barrister comments:
shorter paul k ogden: i don't understand why reporters and liberal bloggers keep mocking my event, just because it lacked focus and a lot of the people there were fringe types and crackpots. they should thanks me—nay, exalt and praise me!
shorter melyssa donaghy: they laugh at us because they're scared!
bonus shorter indiana barrister comments:
shorter gary welsh: i don't care if abdul mocks me, because his radio show sucks.
shorter abdul hakim shabazz: oh yeah? well gary has bad taste in clothes.
shorter paul k ogden: i admit there were a lot of crazies in attendance, but surely everyone can agree that gary welsh is awesome.
shorter gary welsh: actually, my taste in clothes is impeccable. also, abdul is fat.¶
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
if they held a protest and nobody knew what it was about, would it make a sound?
so that right-wing protest, "revolt at the state house", was this morning. it warranted a whopping three-paragraph AP story. here's the story in its entirety (and yes, i'm going against my "no quoting the AP" policy):
well, that sounds like a ragtag bunch. of course, saying the event's "focus" was "the frustration average citizens feel with government at all levels" is a nice way of saying what jim shella said: the event lacked focus.
shella's report is amusing: he plays it for laughs, finding a few fringe types and letting them embarrass themselves on camera. gary welsh, as is his nature, takes shella's criticism personally.
abdul, on the other hand, has no qualms about mocking gary by name, saying that when gary "screams" into a microphone, "he sounds like Godzilla on helium." abdul also writes that "At times it was hard to follow where it all was going. For the next rally, I'd try to stay a little more focused and have a more tangible universal theme that is easy for people to grasp."
compare shella and abdul's complaints with what i wrote a month ago:
of course, as melyssa loves to remind me, nobody reads this blog, so who cares what i have to say? ¶
An eclectic group of nearly 200 people gathered at the Indiana Statehouse today to show lawmakers that they are generally "fed up" with government.
Some at the rally held signs urging lawmakers to retire or be voted out of office. Others wanted to repeal property taxes or stop what they considered eminent domain abuse. Other signs supported a state immigration law and a revolt against socialism.
Speakers at the "Revolt at the Statehouse" event included taxpayer group leaders and community activists. Organizers said the focus of the rally was the frustration average citizens feel with government at all levels.
well, that sounds like a ragtag bunch. of course, saying the event's "focus" was "the frustration average citizens feel with government at all levels" is a nice way of saying what jim shella said: the event lacked focus.
shella's report is amusing: he plays it for laughs, finding a few fringe types and letting them embarrass themselves on camera. gary welsh, as is his nature, takes shella's criticism personally.
abdul, on the other hand, has no qualms about mocking gary by name, saying that when gary "screams" into a microphone, "he sounds like Godzilla on helium." abdul also writes that "At times it was hard to follow where it all was going. For the next rally, I'd try to stay a little more focused and have a more tangible universal theme that is easy for people to grasp."
compare shella and abdul's complaints with what i wrote a month ago:
i don't see this protest attracting a lot of protesters nor much media attention. the whole thing is too vague and ephemeral for tv reporters, who won't have a clue how to cover the thing. and in today's economy, i don't see the typical taxpayer getting too riled up about "the executive and legislative revolving door"—these days, people are more worried about just finding jobs and making ends meet. if this were a focused protest centered around, say, the mess at the CIB, i could see it being a moderate success. but a kitchen-sink protest of complaining about "corporate welfare" is doomed to failure.
of course, as melyssa loves to remind me, nobody reads this blog, so who cares what i have to say? ¶
Monday, March 23, 2009
the nerve of some people is better than others
shorter abdul hakim-shabazz: how dare the city's poor complain about being treated like second-class citizens?!? the city rightfully treats them like crap because they are crap. now shut up, you stupid poor people! ¶
Sunday, March 22, 2009
zot
here's my latest databent illustration. like the arsonist, this is a computer illustration that uses glitched JPEGs for the textures.
both works, as well as many other pieces, will be part of my upcoming gallery show at 111 arts gallery in muncie. opening reception for the show will be april 2.
both works, as well as many other pieces, will be part of my upcoming gallery show at 111 arts gallery in muncie. opening reception for the show will be april 2.
Friday, March 20, 2009
a study of presidential rankings
shorter gary welsh: obama is a worse president than bush, because making an inappropriate joke about the special olympics is clearly worse than dragging the country into an unjust war or indefinitely detaining innocent people. ¶















